Turnoffs When Dating Someone

Time for some “Girl Talk”

Relationships are tough right or wrong? Many of us get involved in relationships and there are things that are happening that we are just blind to see or we just look over it, you know those red flags? I did not want to talk about relationships for a while due to my recent divorce. It is hard to reflect publicly you know! But I think I am ready and I want to get involved on Periscope… want to encourage me? Follow me at CicelyRenee.

I knew how I felt about certain aspects of relationships but wanted to know what others thought as well. I asked a group of men and women, “What were/are the biggest Turnoffs when dating” and I got a TON of answers. Relationships seem to be a hot topic and sometimes you just don’t feel like getting burned.

The top 5 answers I got were:

1. No life goals
2. Pride/Boastful/Cocky
3. Pretending/lying
4. Inconsistency
5. Poor Hygiene

The number 1 turn off is being with someone who has NO LIFE GOALS! I always said, “It is hard following a parked car.” I know for me, a man’s passion and career they  are actively pursuing is a huge turn on. The ones that seem to have these nailed down in my opinion are artists and musicians. I just believe they feel in a whole other realm and just watching them in their passion will make me marry them right then and there. That will blind me like crazy. Make me come up with excuses for them in every other aspect of their lives. I recently told someone I was tired of falling in love with “potential” I was like, why can’t they have it all together right now. Of course I laughed and just went on with the conversation.

Ever been with some cocky person where they thought their boo boo smelled like roses? Like they could do anything but fail? Like they were God’s gift to this world? Another big turn off. Being in a relationship with someone like this, you are bound to be hanging on their coattail. These are the type of people that will not introduce you as their boyfriend or girlfriend to their ex’s. These are the one’s that will walk around the mall giggle and say, “Oh s/he had a crush or wanted to be with me before” Great conversation to have right? The world revolved around them, everybody owed them their attention. Yea, not great relationship material.

I am surprised lying was not number 1. This is one of my HUGEST turnoffs. And it is not just lying, it is omitting the truth. You ask a question and they avoid the answer or give you half an answer. How can your partner trust anything you do or say when you cannot be 100% honest with them.

Inconsistency was huge for me in my marriage. Yes, I knew schedules like clock work because I had to live by the calendar because I was so busy. Now all of a sudden it is taking you an extra hour to get home? Or you just found a new hobby that you are not really interested in but you want to do it now. This just leaves doors open for speculation. But mostly this stems from something you have done already before.

Poor hygiene- this is a big one. I am very germaphobic. Please shower everyday, please brush your teeth and wash your face. Please exfoliate lol! People’s noses are sensitive and even their skin, lol go get a pedicure! LOL

Well anyways, I just wanted to know what others thought about turn offs in a relationship. What is your biggest turn offs when dating? What are some red flags and non negotiable’s  for you?

Here are all the answers I got:

1. Overly aggressive men
2. Pretending/lying +4
3. Smoking
4. Not putting in any effort
5. On any drug +1
6. Improper English +1
7. Broke +1
8. Mamas Boys
9. No education +2
10. Poor Hygiene +3
11. Guys that are dependent
12. Pride/Boastful/Cocky +6
13. Men who live off women
14. Selfish
15. Bad breath +1
16. Texting while talking
17. Not paying attention to your partner +1
18. Dirty Nails
19. Poor Character
20. Close minded +1
21. Racist/homophobic etc.
22. Nice Guy Complex
23. Unfaithful
24. No sense of humor +2
25. No chivalry +1
26. No life goals +7
27. No energy/lazy +2
28. Bad Posture
29. Not upfront with your intentions
30. Immature +2
31. Ignorance
32. Inconsistency +3
33. Negative
34. No spirituality
35. Perverted +1
36. Lack of romance
37. Low self esteem
38. Psychotic
39. Too controlling
40. Lack of consideration for others