The Ramblings of a Bougie Black Blogger– This blog post is just sort of my thoughts unscripted, unedited. Maybe they will help and maybe it is just for me.
There are people that need people to survive, in fact we all do. Many of us play the independent role but secretly we desire relationships and not just in a romantic sense. We all need each other to survive, some show it more loudly than others but human connection is a need that will help us to not only survive but thrive.
Many times I will say, “Do not rely on people to make you happy” which is a hard thing for many people to learn. Some people have it down to a science and that becomes their reality and they expect others to get with the program. They forget that there are many people not quite as strong as they are and that we have to be sensitive to their reality.
To be real, our actions affect others whether we like it or not. Our actions, our words, our silence and our absence affect people in ways you would not even imagine. We connect to people spiritually, mentally, physically and emotionally and because we are connected we can feel so deeply.
I realized over the last year that I was an Empath and when I realized that, everything made so much sense. I understood why I was so attached to people in an emotional way. If you want to read more about empaths check out this blog post.
But I say all of this to point out how what we do can drive people to do crazy things. But know, people have the choice to do the
things they do so there is no blame at all but we do have an affect on others moods. I watched Being Mary Jane, season 3 ep. 3 and I just cried. I felt that Lisa, in season 2 would do something close to suicide. I watched nervously, I wanted Mary Jane to be kinder, I wanted everyone to hear what wasn’t being said. But everybody was too worried about their own feelings, their own secrets and their own lives and that is understandable. I just wanted Lisa to be seen and so many people’s blinders were on.
I just feel so bad for Lisa, I know it was just a tv show but this is reality for many people watching. I am sorry for the Lisa’s out there and the close friends and family of a Lisa. I am angry at the people that kept the molestation under the covers. We, in the black community do that. We do not want shame brought to our name. Everything is a secret. We do not want people to know the darkness that we hide. This is so dangerous. I just want to know, who was really there for the Lisa’s? We pretend to console, only to try to hide the fear and the pain. Even on How to Get Away With Murder, we found out that AnnaLise was molested as a child but there was no therapy, no help, no release for her.
There is a famous quote:
Maybe this is easy for me because of who I am but either way, there are people seriously hurting and no they cannot just get over it. No they cannot just move on. Their reality is not our reality and we have to accept that and them and not force our beliefs on them.
I just want to send a prayer out to anyone who is feeling less than, or are in a dark place where they want to give up. Know that you do matter, and you are here for a purpose. I pray you find that purpose long before the darkness tries to takeover. I pray for the people that are hurting you, realize that hurting people hurt people. Even though it does not make it right it helps us give grace to those. Jesus said we need to forgive others 77×7 times a day- those that are hurting us mentally, physically, emotionally and verbally. Forgiving those that have hurt us deeply is so hard, I pray for strength to forgive. I pray that people who are yelling in different ways begin to be heard so that there can be changes made. I pray that hearts and souls be mended so that we can hear testimonies around the world. I pray for peace and love, there just isn’t enough of that going around.
I was going to apologize for this post being so spiritual but I do not apologize- I pray that you see, hear and believe in the message so that you can go forth spreading love instead of hate. I love you and pray nothing but blessing over you and your life.
If you need to talk please feel free to contact me or the suicide hotline:
Well thank you for reading, please subscribe, share, comment and like- I would greatly appreciate it!
Peace and Blessings,